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A retelling of my life in DC and all the stupid ass sh!t I get myself into...

Crazy Taxi(s)

On an average day, the average cab has a mediocre grasp on traffic laws in the DC Metro area at best. I'm not sure why this is or how they pass their driving tests, but that's just the way it is. I'm not talking about a little aggressive driving or weaving in traffic, I mean full on bullsh!t. 45 point turns on small roads blocking traffic, left turns from the right lane across 5 lanes, and don't you dare stick one of our many fine coachman behind the wheel of a Toyota Camry cab for fear of an immediate 10 car pile up!

Regular cabbies are bad enough daily as I mention, but don't you dare toss in a storm like we had last night into the mix. I'm convinced, whatever traffic logic they had left in them got washed away. At what point do you think it's ok to stop on an over pass and take up half the road just to chat? I mean honestly, WTF? Why are you parking perpendicular to the street blocking all traffic? Do you need to drive with one hand on your cell phone texting while looking at the side walks for your next fare? At what point are you in ANY WAY paying attention to the road? I'm thrilled to tears when I do find a decent cab driver who isn't trying to steal from you, or kill you, or anyone else on the road. What does their help wanted ad sound like I wonder?

Don't speak any English and drive like sh!t? Come drive a cab in the DC metro area!! Perks including ripping off anyone and everyone, never having to shower, & yelling at everyone on the street in your native tongue. Apply today!


posted by Cptn S.A. Ho @ 9:42 AM,


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