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A retelling of my life in DC and all the stupid ass sh!t I get myself into...



My night on the Odyssey

I've been on the Odyssey before so I was looking forward to taking some friends out for a nice evening but this experience was just so shockingly awful that I found myself spending a good deal of my evening apologizing for my selection of our evening cuisine. Let's start out with some sloooooow service. How hard is it to take a drink order in under 20 minutes? I know, I know, we are on your boat and we play by your rules. But really, did you go to the bar and have a couple rounds while we waited so that you could tell us first hand how the drinks were?

A nice gentleman brings us some rolls to snack on while the server is MIA. But wait, they are still fcuking frozen?? Wow. No mystery about how freshly baked these are. I mean seriously, there are instructions on the box that say warm before serving!! But, no worries. Here comes our server with some wine to keep us happy and the boat engines kick on which means it's time to go. Pushing off the dock was so loud, the server was shouting to be heard over the sound of the engine and the earthquake like side effect was just plain comical. Think about trying to get a girls number at the 930 club with some crappie indie band playing in the back ground, it's about like that.

We get out into the water, the engines calm down to a nice dull roar, the vibrations are no longer shaking every single piece of silver ware in the room and I have a glimmer of hope for a nice evening on our pleasure cruise. The first course arrives which is a nice side salad with chick peas and a light parmesan vinaigrette that made for a great flavor combination. Finally. Things are looking up! As the entrée’s arrive, I realize I’ve spoken too soon. We (there were four of us) all order different dishes in an effort to try more of the menu. Each dish had a protein that was perfectly dried out. I know you have space on this floating barge to have a full kitchen, why would you clearly pre-plate everything and let it dry out in a hot box? Why why why?

No one can screw up desert, can they? Yes, they can. I think mine was actually a little freezer burnt. My girlfriend’s bread pudding had the consistency of a hockey puck and needed a steak knife to be cut. Ok, take away the texture and the plates were still uninspired. Desert was chased with a cup of coffee and we were then chased off the boat b/c it had already docked by then.

Why is this not a 1 star review? Well, I’ve been on a dinner cruise with this company before and they didn’t fcuk everything up this bad. The waiter was nice, but really everything seemed to go wrong for him as far as timing or food goes. Also, it turns out that this was a shortened cruise for some reason. That means we didn’t actually get to go and see any thing cool. National harbor was in the distance, but that’s about it. We spent most of our time near shorelines that were unlit and frankly, quite boring. If you do try to take one of these cruises, make sure it’s a full length cruises.

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posted by Cptn S.A. Ho @ 10:10 AM,

2 Comments:

At Tue Dec 29, 04:25:00 PM EST, Blogger Me said...

Note to self- don't go on that boat.

 
At Tue Dec 29, 04:26:00 PM EST, Blogger Cptn S.A. Ho said...

I've been on it before, and it wasn't bad at all. I think we ended up being the table of if it can go wrong it did go wrong. Go in the spring sometime. It's actually not bad.

 

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