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A retelling of my life in DC and all the stupid ass sh!t I get myself into...



Redskinnin yo!

Hellooooooo redskins fans!!! How R ya??? I'm good, after a 2 mile hike from the metro! What's that all about? No shuttle, no nuthin, just keep on walkin and walkin and walkin till you see the stadium, then walk some more!! Ugh.... NE wayz, after a few minutes of walkin, I've finally made it to catch up with Shamrock, Fagnostic and Haystack at the tailgating lot, unfortunately, I've missed everything this morning except for a few last minute shot guns! Score! Lemmie show you kids how it's done! We head into the game, and I'm warned that they do pat you down for weapons and liquor bottles, although Shamrock claims that she is so well endowed she could easily smuggle a few flasks unnoticed... I'll deff keep that in the back of my head for future games! But, as I only brought a few airplane bottles with me, I just use the ol Liquor in the boxer briefs tactic that I've become so fond of at good ol WCU.

Cleared the gate, now let's find me a soda to get this silly liquor into!! The game is a lot of fun, the seats aren't bad either. I think Haystack and Fagnostic were sitting somewhere ON the field tho..... yeah, their seats were that good! Red skins are kickin ass all game long.... then fall back to a tie in the fourth quarter, then take an L in Over time. Nuts. A loss spells out sh!tty tailgating!!! It's ok tho, there's still a good turn out and deff some impressive tailgatin'! These people aren't jokin around!! The guy to the right sets up a flat top over a giant set of burners , chops some onions, then drops a giant ball of meat to make some of the best Chese Steaks I've had in a while!! His name is appropriately "Chop"! This next picture is even more impressive. What you see is a VW Jetta painted in the Redskins team colors with a TV (1) powered by it's batteries and a Transformer, A retractable gas grill mounted in the trunk(2), and a satellite dish on the roof(3). West coast customs, eat your heart out!!

posted by Cptn S.A. Ho @ 1:35 PM, ,




Brew Pub Night!

Happy driving day after the turkey weekend finds me in the car tryin to make it back in time to meet up with everyone and try out the DogFish Head Brewery... I know, strange name. So, I get back to the city, jump gratefully into my jeep, and take off to meet up with haystack for "One Quick Drink" at this new place with friends. Maryland?!?!?!! Yeah, we head up to that far far away land of makebelieve and meet up with everyone and as this is a brewpub, we order the sampler to see what all the beers taste like from here.
The mix is excellent, but my fav is deff the 90-Minute IPA. Later to be called the 90-second ale... and we're still getting a good laugh outta that one! So we hang out and drink a few, then a few more, then we recruit the girl(Lauren) sitting at the bar to join us (She's a cool chick in my book, it takes some serious balls to join a random group of people, and late night with em at some random house too!!)...She's the one on the top right of the pic b/t me and Haystack. And then we drink a few more rounds. Last call?!?!!? That was quick... let's all late night since we're in a party mood NE wayz. As we all head over to the closest house, we pass & get passed by like 1,000 freakin cops!! They must not have much to do tonight, so they are ALL out cruisin! We get to RU469's house and she puts out a bottle of Parrot bay that disappears almost instantly... luckily we took some togo cokes from the bar for mixer! See we were thinkin... but not enough as Late Night and I make a run for the store for more!
What great timing, they are replacing the magazines that didn't sell with new ones... although I think I screwed up their count more then a few times, They relented and let me have a few maxim's to take with me as my bounty!

posted by Cptn S.A. Ho @ 8:00 AM, ,




Go Heels!!

Well aren't I becoming quite the sports fan? Here just a few weeks ago I went to see the Washington Capitals play...and lose unfortunately, but I checked it out anyway & I'll be at the Redskins game on Sunday! Good times. Here I've found myself at the UNC Basketball game. The game was great, I brought a little bit of Capt'n with me in case it wasn't, but it was a great game. UNC Won by about 20 points in the last 5 minutes!! Good team.... but then again, my motto... as long as duke loses, I'm not tooo too concerned who wins. It's just always a bonus when it's UNC!!

posted by Cptn S.A. Ho @ 8:18 PM, ,




Another Wednesday??

Aaaaah, what a glorious night.... Despite being exhausted from working the night before and a full day today, I've still been able to find it in my heart to go out tonight. (Go figure) So I meet up with Karl for a quick round at Rock Bottom, after all, it is Wednesday.... PINT NIGHT! Good deals, but it's hella crowded in there and lookin like college night! So we take off and meet up with a few people at the hated Whitlow's for a round. Our krew are calling it an early night there, so back on the horn to meet up with Bolo and Nikki... Ok, they'll pick us up at Balston. Cool. I venture to get something to eat while we wait for them.... luckily I know someone that works at Mac Grill and they hook me up with one of those warm loaves of bread... Yummy! So we head up to the city and find parking!! I'm shocked... there's plenty of parking! What on earth is going on? Must be a holiday or something. So, we're off to the Big Hunt to catch up with everyone. We arrive just in time to have a beer and watch Rodeo and Molly shoot a game of pool against Mwombeki and some strange guy. An interesting entertainment. The strange guy challenges me next to a quick game, I run the table for about the first 5 balls, then end up losing b/c I sunk in my own 8 ball.... nuts!
Well, on to the club! We hit club 5 to listen to the musical stylings of RU469's brother on the tables spinning some House, drum and bass style techno. He's pretty good and so are the $5 redbull/vodka's! We dance and socialize and hang out for a while till I get a call from Kirk and Jon saying that they are out front and to come on out.... ok. (I found out later that we all decided that it was time to go and left, but I must have gotten side tracked and went to the bar first!!) We pile in a cab and head for food. IHOP it is.... "Balston please Sir" I announce to the driver...Well, that's what it sounded like in my head!!
The cab driver dumps us out, and Jon makes a bee line for the nearest pole as pictured above. In the picture, please notice the item labeled 1) pile of puke in IHOP parking lot, and item 2) Jon flicking us off as we laugh at his misery! We think ok, let's get some food elsewhere as IHOP no longer looks very tasty based on the last scene we just endured. Baileys has wings!! But lo and behold, they've had kitchen problems and have no food. Damn. Well, not the end of the world. We pick Jon up off of the mall floor and throw him into yet another cab and head straight to... you guessed it... Taco Bell!! We order the whole menu....again! I try to offer the driver a taco no less then 20 times on the way to the house, but he is very polite saying he just ate.
We make it into the house and grab haystack a bucket... he needs it! Picture the scene, if you've been to my house, you'll understand. Two couches caddy cornered to each other. On couch one, you've got a guy yakin' his guts up and not feelin so hot. On couch 2 next to him, you've got two guys eating taco bell, discussing it, and watching the guy on couch one puke!! "Pass me some more hot sauce" and "What's this we're eating.. Oh... Beans? Brilliant!" were phrases heard during the commercials of Futureama.

posted by Cptn S.A. Ho @ 9:04 AM, ,




Gettin Stuck!

So here I am gettin a little blood drawn as the doc is worried since I wasn't feelin well after the long weekend. I'm sure I’ll be fine, but if I’m not, I’ll let you guys know about it when I know about it in 2 days! But, I was deff glad to take a break from the world yesterday and take care of a few small errands, grab a bite to eat, followed by a good amount of rest (Doc's Orders!) on the couch.

posted by Cptn S.A. Ho @ 12:33 PM, ,




Just a quick trail!!

Ok, before you guys get all worked up, this pic is my receipt to my waitress at my bar.. she's a friend of mine and got a kick out of how silly and stupid we were. Besides I left her plenty of cash so don't you kids worry about that. (If you must know, check was $15.35, tip was $10)

Today’s hares - Udder Ho, Motor Mouth, Knee Jerk, & Myself... We meet up and set us a nice trail with a few twists and turns in an area that I’m a tad bit familiar with. A good handful got to run down 4 levels of parking deck for a huge YBF mark, there was some construction site to play in, and we had an excellent shot check of Captain and Cider (Very nice!) Second half of trail found us running by the old house where the evil landlord may/may not be dwelling with a note scribed "Love don't live here no mo!" which I found to be very very funny! Then onto Knee Jerks house to finish up the day. Apparently, they found cause to violate us in EVERY round! I think we all did 5 or 6 back to back down downs.... well... at least the beer was cold, right? Anyway, we go on to the bar for a bite to eat... wings, pizza, more beer!! You know, that sorta thing. Great turn out by all as we took over more then half the place! A few of us stayed a little too late socializing and discussing appropriate locations for meeting people. Good times!

posted by Cptn S.A. Ho @ 8:45 PM, ,




Runnin all day..

Saturday morning finds our breakfast club moved to my house at around the crack of 10am after a good evening out at dremo's the night before. The idea was to have a bite to eat, hang out then be in reston by 1pm to meet up with peoples and hang out before we all did the run. We start makin some breakfast, the champagne comes out for the mimosa's, next thing you know we've got the southpark season 6 DVD out and are laughin our a$$es off at it. Not to mention watching the episode of drawn together with foxy and the dolphin bearing light saber!! Too damn funny! We also discover urban dictionary.com and have an excellent time helping Wendy further her understanding of what a Pearl necklace is as there are 10 definitions of it!! Finally I get off my ass and get moving.... Gotta get my 5k race packet before the thing starts!!
We get there and find a 10-13 people support group for our running cause that have been at the bar all morning!! Cool!! We're thrilled for your support! So we do the run, and it's pretty obvious what a bad distance runner I am, but that's ok, this is a pretty cool run and not everyone is in a huge hurry. A few miles and we're done!! Time to head back to the bar with everyone else... I am beat!! A chicken samich and I'm takin it to the house! That's all I've got left in me for today. I walk in the house to find people already beat me back there and are veggin on my couches!! Good idea... I think I'll join you to the tune of A few more south park episodes, Welcome to Mooseport, and the old skool Spaceballs! An excellent veggin time!

posted by Cptn S.A. Ho @ 11:08 AM, ,




Drunk Shirt!

I love this shirt!!!

posted by Cptn S.A. Ho @ 8:17 AM, ,




Product Reviews

So many of you may have been following my excitement with both Dell and Apple by now since it's been going on for a few weeks. You haven't?? Well let me fill you in....

Apple

I got an iPod mini around the very end of last year & have been using it happily until recently the battery started loosing power earlier and earlier to the point where it would only last about 3 hours. Contacted apple and they sent me another iPod mini (same color and everything!!). I posted a few days ago on that. Well, I plugged it up, loaded it with songs.... and as it turns out this ones broken too!!! Dumb luck!!! Ok, apple.com.... here I come again!! So the phone tech support guy who is very nice sets up an appointment at the genius bar at the apple store in pentagon city mall to have the issue fixed. Cool. Unfortunately, they kicked me out of work about an hour early so I get to the bar and they give me a pager. You ever heard of that? The store gave me a pager to roam the mall with and they'd get to me at the appointment that was set for me at the wrong time. I think they have a contract with the mall to force people to walk around till you buy something then they page you! Great racket! (I bought a stupid video game I didn't need!) So, they replaced my iPod, I've restored the software on it, rebooted and all that. Now I'll just need to load some songs on it & see if this one works. Hopefully it does as I don't want iPod #4 to happen this quick!!!

Dell

Ok, Dell is on my SH!T list!! I ordered a new XPS laptop from them on the 26th of last month.... it just shipped out today!!! Now I know I'm not the most patient person in the world, but it should not take 20+ days to stick a laptop in a box and ship it out. Ya know?
Latest update - The hold up was the processor. They didn't have any of the one I requested. Why not just ask me to change it? It's sooooo simple and makes sense to me. O well, atleast they feel weally weally bad about it and are trying to buy back my love and affection like a good step parent....with gift cards of course!
=)

FireFox
If any of you have been having problems using blogger with your MS Internet Explorer... try downloading Firefox. This thing is fast as hell!!! Deff thumbs up on this one!

Fed Ex
Next explain to me how a package that leaves on the 14th and is scheduled to arrive on the 17th claims to be over night shipping & charges you for it? Anyone??

posted by Cptn S.A. Ho @ 2:05 PM, ,




Balancing Act


This is a pic from the bar last night from a really cool bar trick.... the two forks are balancing on a tooth pick that's balancing on another tooth pick that's standing out of a salt shaker. They also spin!! Too damn cool!

posted by Cptn S.A. Ho @ 7:57 PM, ,




Great CSI

CSI = Customer Service Index, not any of that crime scene crap that's on TBS and USA 24 hrs a day. Good CSI is rare these days, especially from large companies. So, when I run across some excellent customer service I find it's my job to share with all of you out there.
I contacted apple b/c my iPod was starting to act up. I got it last year just before x-mas and wanted to get it all taken care of before it was a year old so as to avoid paying too much for any repairs. So, I contact them via their website at 4pm on Tuesday to state my trouble with my iPod and fill in a service claim. By 9am the following morning there was a pre-paid same day air shipping box waiting for me in my office. Damn!! ok, stick in the iPod and ship it off, I'm sure I'll get it back this month if I'm lucky...right? WRONG!!! They received the iPod the next day and sent me confirmation that they had it and were looking into it. The next day they said they had remedied the problem.... Friday morning there's another box waiting for me... a brand new iPod mini! I guess it's just cheaper for them to throw a new one at me then fix my old one, fine by me. Let's just recap the time line... less then 5 days INCLUDING shipping to contact, diagnose and fix my problem? My hat's off to you apple people. Now if you could just find a way to scrap iTunes and start all over there!!
The dell people could stand to learn something here...but that's a rant for another day if my new laptop ever gets here!?!?!?!

posted by Cptn S.A. Ho @ 3:22 PM, ,




May cause minor coma's!

I know some of you are confused by my random pic of a virus poster... let me explain..... (this is where the wavy dream sequence that fades into a back-story would normally be)...

So, it was Sunday after too many mimosa's and $60+ of Chinese food with the usual suspects when we decide to go run trail with the White House Crew. Sure, why not we've been partyin for a few days straight let's keep it up!! So were on trail, I'm running thru the exact same path as everyone else has before me. All of a sudden, I get stung repeatedly (I'm guessing it's bees or wasps or something, I'm not sure as I didn't see them)!! I get a few stings in my hand and a few in my back and a few in my ankle. I dunno what they were, but they were PISSED!!

Ok, now fast forward to two days later and my hand is swollen like I'm a sterile surgical glove filled up with air!! This don't look good. As much as I hate going to the doctor, This thing needs to get looked at. I'm in the waiting area eating some lunch with my swollen hand...What? I was hungry!... and there's the sign that I took a picture of and sent it in to blogspot from my cell phone for your enjoyment and confusion!

The diagnosis - I was stung soooo many times in the same place is why my hand swelled up so much. Let's give you a new tetnus shot, and some shiny bottles of pills to make you allll better! Ain't that always the key? I get home (after I work my night job) take the medication...Then 5 minutes later it was 11am the next day! May cause drowsiness my a$$!!! May cause instant coma is more like it!

posted by Cptn S.A. Ho @ 12:21 PM, ,




Mobile Blogger Pic

posted by Cptn S.A. Ho @ 3:04 PM, ,




Court Date

As some of you may have heard, we got evicted and sued by our previous landlord for things that we did not do. For example, she sued us in the beginning of September for October’s rent money. She would repeatedly come into the house and switch off light switches and ceiling fans. All questions with non-working items in the house were met with “If you don’t like it, you can be out by the end of the month”. She’s just a peach! Even the neighbors said they aren’t too fond of her. At any rate, we take a day off of work and show up to court….AGAIN! So, here we are sitting on the benches opposite her waiting our turn to speak. So after a long drawn out case that went nowhere, it’s our turn. We go get sworn in to speak and our illustrious land lord has some complaints and claims.

You get the idea. If you’ve ever been by the house or know me at all, you’d know that it was never trashed and we don’t make late payments etc. The judge, worn down from the previous case, just interrupted her through her spiel and told her that all her claims were invalid on all the charges except for the $25 bounced check fee. He looked at us and asked if we have any problem with that and we of course said no (all of us trying to cover-up huge smiles!!). I’m pretty sure she was a little disappointed by this ruling as she ran out of the court room before we could give her the $25 forcing us to mail it. Buuut….. since we’re all together… Let’s do lunch!!

posted by Cptn S.A. Ho @ 4:53 PM, ,




A new shot is born!

So last night i'm workin at the bar, and a few people decide to stop by for a few too many coctails. Excellent!! My favorite type! One guy decides to make up a shot, which turns out to be not half bad yet I think half the fun is in ordering it and freakin people out. It's called a golden shower. I think the same guy ended up doing about 5 or so himself just b/c he was so proud of himself for inventing it, followed by about 6-7 more for some of the other bar patrons.
No major commotion last night, but it was my managers birthday... poor thing had to work on her own birthday. That hella sux! When it's my b-day, i'll be sleeepin it off from the night before!!

Golden Shower Shot:
1/2 oz. Goldschlager
1/2 oz. Creme de Banana
1/2 oz. Pineapple Juice

I'm told you get the Goldschlager to make it gold, you get the Creme de Banana to make it phallic, and the Pineapple juice to give it that nice cloudy shade of yellow!!

posted by Cptn S.A. Ho @ 10:23 AM, ,